Believe it or not, I did not vibe with Violet when I first got her. She was so different than my first dog that I couldn’t help but compare her. Gordie was so go go go and would do back flips for me no questions asked. Violet was so no no no and what’s in it for me type of dog. My husband wanted a less intense dog and we got that.
Gordie was clingy – Violet was overly independent. Baby Gordie wouldn’t leave my side. Baby Violet would wonder away from me and didn’t look back. I was worried when I saw her behaviours as a puppy. She never laid in my lap for a cuddle. Not until about 5 months old.
I had to adapt for her. I had to change for her. I had to figure her out. Meanwhile Gordie adapted for me, he figured me out, he changed for me. Obviously you can’t compare. An English Setter to an English Springer Spaniel. An independent woman to a clingy boy.
But once I figured her out, she became so perfect for me. I just think she is so perfect. She is the best dog. She is very sweet and sensitive. Very goofy, and play is certainly her way (Jay Jack pun intended). I can’t believe I use to be disappointed in her for being her. Honestly dog owners, reread that line.
**I can’t believe I use to be disappointed in my dog for being themselves.**
I couldn’t change her, and I wouldn’t. I know how to get her to “go go go” now. We built an amazing bond. But relationship isn’t everything as much as people think. It is but it isn’t. For an independent dog like Violet, relationship wouldn’t solve everything. I don’t care what they say. That dog needed more. So I gave her more.
I feel like so many of us struggle to match with the dog that we got. But it’s not about matching. It’s about blending together. Knowing your dog, truly knowing them. Then working WITH them with what you know about their personality, their likes and dislikes, their temperament. What drives them. What THEY need or want (not you!). Not changing them, but accepting them. Once you crack that code you have the most amazing friend.
